Our Twosome is Three

Well, it seems my babies are turning THREE today. And I guess I will have to face up to the fact that I don't have babies anymore. Having twins has been such a body slam of a learning experience, but as difficult learning experiences go, one couldn't ask for better.

I thought it might be fun to look back on some pictures of the kids' first three years.

They were born in 2005, five days before Christmas. But they came six weeks early, after a futile night of drugged stupor trying to keep them inside my body for as long as possible. It seemed Luka was pushing Ethan out and wanted a room of his own, as he stayed inside more than an hour after Ethan emerged.

Both boys were head down, and I succeeded in giving birth the natural way, even though we did it in the surgery, with the docs and nurses scrubbed for a possible sudden C-Section. As the birthing went on in a gentle, normal way, the masks came down, the gloves and little paper hats came off, and it was a very relaxed and happy environment albeit more sterile than the pretty birthing rooms down the hall.

They were both little over four pounds each and were whisked away to intensive care, where they were tubed, wired and gently cared for. It was not the "mommy and me" moment I had been imagining but I really wanted to know if they were okay, and have any immediate treatment given if necessary.


Luka seemed happy to see Ethan again when they were reunited. Despite being six weeks early, the medicine they gave me the night before to quickly mature their lungs seemed to do its job, and aside from a short period of being given oxygen, they did quite well on their own.

I did get some skin on skin time shortly afterward. This is Luka above and Ethan below, just outside of their little incubator beds they would spend the next three weeks sleeping in, when not cuddling with Mommy. You can see the strain of the nasty Magnesium Stupor I was in (the medicine used to keep the babies inside me made me stu-pid!). Look how little Noah was. He had just turned three... the age my (not) babies are today.

Our hospital was AWESOME as they provided a FREE room for me to live in for three weeks so I could bond with the twins and provide as much breastfeeding as possible. It was odd to call the hospital home. Snowstorms raged outside and I hung out in my hospital room and ate every meal in the cafeteria. Every three or four hours around the clock I would go to the NICU and scrub in, and attempt to breastfeed and pump what was left over to be sent down their feeding tubes when they grew too tired to drink anymore. While being willing, they never really became adept at taking in as much as their bodies required, so I fed both babies and the pump for the next few months.

Here they are with Daddy in their Christmas best! That is Ethan in green and Luka in blue. The NICU nurses decorated all the little beds for the holidays and surprised us with ornaments that had their footprints on them. Every one of those nurses was beyond wonderful, specially chosen to work with these tiny troubled babies.

Here they are sleeping together in the NICU. I love the intensity of Luka's eyes. This might have been the last time Ethan was the sleeper while Luka was awake. Their heads, when born were just a little bigger than tennis balls. Those are my hands.

After three looooong weeks, they jumped through the NICU's hoops, passed their "thriving" tests, and were allowed to go home. Ethan actually got released a couple days prior to Luka and stayed in my hospital room with me. The last two nights before heading home I got NO sleep at all as Ethan was the LOUDEST tiny sleeper I have ever seen. Even when I wasn't wheeling him to the NICU to visit his brother every three hours, his crazy snoring kept me awake in the short naps I attempted between feedings. I went home in such a fog.


At home, I had the benefit of my mother's help, who moved in with Michael to care for Noah the whole three weeks I lived with the twins in the hospital. Then she was there most every day to help us out at home. I have no idea how we would have managed otherwise.


After easily fitting into our home and our family, Luka and Ethan's personalities began to emerge.

Especially Ethan's...



And Ethan taught Luka to be as goofy as he was...

Living in Ohio just outside of Twinsburg, we took advantage of the annual Twins Festival. These guys were voted "most alike". Our guys could probably have won "least alike" if we had tried.


Noah never really went through that whole sibling jealousy thing, thank goodness. He has been a pretty caring big brother. Mostly. Heh.


We laugh sometimes that we have a dark boy with black hair, a medium boy with brown hair and a transparent boy with blond hair.

As much as I looooove my boys, some of my favorite times are the rare occasions when they are both unconscious.


It's been SO fun watching them grow and learn...


...and become friends as well as brothers.


I could live without all the mischief and destruction of personal property.

The boys are as different as night and day. Luka, despite being the quiet one, might well become the leader. He is physically gifted, balanced and exhuberant. He hops and runs more than he walks. Ethan is the jokester. He is also "the lover" of my three kids, giving me the cuddle-fixes I need on a daily basis. He knows how to work his flirting skills as well.

I love this picture... they actually look like twins in this one.


I love that they have each other, and always will.


Despite their differences, they will be in each others lives in bad times...



And in good times.


My birthday wish for them is good times.
And lots of them.

Happy Birthday, Sweetie-boys!

As If She Didn't Have a Bazillion Things On Her Plate Already

My Mom started her own blog a few months ago, describing her life on Sanibel Island in Florida, and hers and my Dad's volunteer job with C.R.O.W. actually rescuing injured wildlife from dumpsters and bridges.

What a lot of folks don't realize is that one of her great loves is genealogy, the tracing of family trees. She has been doing our family for MANY years and has literally taken a couple of the lines back to the year 400. FOUR HUNDRED! (Have you heard of my great-gazillionth grandfather, Charlemagne? Well, he's probably your ancestor, too, cousin!)

In a late night epiphany, my Mom decided to start a new genealogy blog called Branches and Roots, where she will tell about our family, be a resource for others searching the same lines, and give help where she can.

This photo is of her parents on their wedding day in 1926. My grandmother, Opal, graduated from high school the very next day.

Why don't you head over to her new blog and check it out!

Old Friends / Bookends

I feel a little bit more like my old self again.

My good friend, whose name is also Karen, was in town and spent a full (nearly) 24 hours with us, and brought along her two kids, Gavin and Chloe. I hadn’t seen them in years so they had morphed somehow from small children into teenagers!

We had the chance to catch up between crazy toddler tantrums and naps, deciding to spend the day inside because of the rain and the multitude of children. She got to watch my kids go and I got to know her kids as the young adults they are becoming.

Karen and I whipped up an awesome dinner for all of us of Asian noodles and tofu and veggie stir fry. It rocked, if I do say so myself. Then we stayed up far too late into the night talking and squeezing in as much girlie talk as we could muster.

After a fitful night with Ethan having a multitude of bad dreams, we were up at the crack of dawn (which is sleeping in for some of us!). We pulled some clothes on and gathered Karen’s things and the whole lot of us (8!) headed out to a big breakfast. Quiche, Cinnamon French toast, and blintzes all around. And coffee. Did I mention the coffee??

After breakfast, Michael took our kids home in one van while I took Karen and crew to the airport. The kids were flying out to their dad’s in Wisconsin and Karen was heading to Rhode Island an hour later. We had many last minute hugs and photos in the white zone (which is for loading and unloading of passengers only!) and then they were off!

Since Michael is working all day Sunday, I took the free time to get some much needed shopping done… plastic Christmas tree decorations so the balls won’t shatter when Luka pulls the tree down while climbing it, and also some Hanukkah candles. I also had to pick up some stocking stuffers (to help Santa out, being so busy as he is this time of year). Bought some small toys, with lots of plasticky goodness (Now with more lead!!).

Then it was home and unpacking all the odds and ends, cleaning up a bit before the “witching hour” as Karen so aptly described the time between about 5 and 6pm when your kids just decide to go insane en masse.

She tells us we are not alone.

And it certainly doesn’t help when all three of them have diarrhea. Forgive the potty talk but we have been going through diapers and Spiderman Undies like Spinal Tap goes through drummers.

***later***

No sooner did I finish writing the above when I heard the tell-tale sound of the dreaded crying/coughing coming from the twins’ bedroom. Ethan woke up with that familiar whimpering and I sprinted to his dark bedside. I put one hand on his back, and the other smooshed down into his pillow covered in that sour-cottage-cheese that all mothers and fathers know so well.

So we spent the last half hour cleaning carpets (yes, more vomit came on the way to the bathroom) and cribs and walls and floors. One blessing of babies wanting their mommies so much is that while I did have to strip the disgusting clothes off of him, I got the baby-cuddles, fresh diapering and the new pajamas, while Michael dealt with the bulk of the sick mush. But then he deals with bodily fluids on a daily basis and just the smell alone makes me want to add to the mess.

This lovely turn of events bookends nicely with Luka’s projectile performance at dinner tonight (so glad this did not happen in front of guests!!).

Hmmm… and add that to Noah’s tantrum because no one would carry him to the bathroom to wash his hands before dinner… leading to a definite lack of eating said dinner.

How long does one witching hour take?? I think it’s been about 5 and a half hours so far…

…and now I sit typing again, this time to the beat of the washing machine, which has been getting more use lately at night than mid-day.

***

Time it was and what a time it was,

it was...
A time of innocence -- a time of confidences.
Long ago... it must be... I have a photograph.
Preserve your memories...

they're all that's left you.

***

Letter To My Teenage Self

This post was written a little while back in response to this writing challenge over at Mom's Daily Dose. I saved it for a time such as this when I have nothing to give you, and my readership is dwindling because all I write about is my booty. Spoils. Winnings. Whatever!

You can read some other people's letters to their dumb teenage selves too, by clicking on that link.

I wish I had some nasty old picture of myself in high school so you can see who I am writing to, but I burned all those before leaving Ohio.

*************

Letter to My Teenage Self (circa 1982)


Karen,

Hi, its me, from 2007!

Yeah, weird, huh?

I just wanted to write and let you know that you rock! Don’t believe me, huh? Yeah, well that’s a self esteem thing you are going to carry around for awhile before you get over it. But you know, all those popular girls are going through it too, they just hide it better.

So, lets see, it’s a good opportunity to give you some good advice.

First thing’s first. Stop Brushing Your Hair!! No really… Do you want to stop looking like a bush? Get some of that stuff that some of the girls use to make their bangs really tall. It’s new. It’s called Gel. Wash your hair, rub this stuff on, scrunch it with your hands, and don’t brush your hair!! Just let it air dry! You will look far more like Farrah Fawcett if you do this, than you do now using that curling iron to make that “tube” down the side of your hair. And if you insist on curling your hair back, get it feathered for god’s sake!

Next, you remember that interview with Joseph Campbell where he talks about his theory called Follow Your Bliss, where if you don’t know what to do with yourself, just aim yourself towards whatever feels blissful and you will go forward on a path that will bring you happiness? Remember how you thought that might be a good way to live your life?

It is. Do it.

For now, though, don’t worry so much about everything. High school FEELS so incredibly important, but really it’s not. In fact, looking back, I have so few memories of high school because I almost never ever think about it. Or I blocked it out. One or the other.

And stop trying to fit in so much. All those popular people who are big fishes in that little pond, are going to be LOST in college, I tell ya!

LOST!

One of them, who you will swear now doesn’t even know your name, will stop you on a sidewalk at college and talk about how long it’s been, and ask you to hang out. You might want to be slightly more polite to her than I was. That’s just the kind thing to do. She probably feels in college like you do now, in high school.

So, college? You are gonna LOVE IT!! So much so, that you will attend about six of them. You will thrive like you never did in high school. You are eventually going to have this urge to follow your bliss across country to California, which will lead to a cheap education in junior college. Do it. You will make some of the best friends of your life there, and they will be the ones you stick with and who support you through the years, even if visits with some of them are few and far between. You will have your first real long term boyfriend there too, and will stay friends with him forever.

That idea of taking theater classes for fun because no one REALLY makes a living in theater?

Wrong.

A few of those friends are going to do pretty darn well for themselves. At first I was tempted to just tell you to quit floundering around and go major in theater, but if you do, you may never meet your future husband (yes, it does EVENTUALLY happen) who is currently 9 years old as you read this. Yep.

And by the way… he is going to be everything you want in a man.

And more.

Before that though, you are going to have to go through some hard-lesson-learning. You are going to date a guy for three years. He will teach you SO FREAKING MUCH about life. He is so wonderful, and such a mess at the same time. He will shape your philosophy of life, religion, politics, what music you listen too. He will steer you toward the person I am today. He is not easy to live with. Stick it out. But only for two years. That last year? It was a year too long. Don’t believe him when he says he is nothing without you. He will be just fine.

You will eventually work in professional theater and it will be the most creatively rewarding thing you do until you have children.

And, oh, about the children. That idea of tea parties and pink tutus and playing house?

Ain’t gonna happen.

No matter how much you or your future husband plan on having little girls? Again, ain’t gonna happen. Three boys. All completely different from each other. All completely awesome. Start studying little boys now. They are mystifying.

Basically, if you follow your bliss, everything is going to work out for the best. You are going to feel like you are constantly blessed. You do most of the broad strokes just right.

Otherwise, I would say...

*Travel internationally more.

*Stay away from that DJ in Anaheim, he’s married, but he won’t tell you that.

*Keep the hotel room door closed if you are ever passing through Las Vegas with a cat.

*That year in Davis, CA? Nothing really gained. Waste of time. Except you get to live in a Victorian flat and a warehouse loft. That’s cool.

*Floss! My teeth are a mess thanks to you. You owe me 3000 dollars!

Oh, and you know that little company called Microsoft? And that little nest egg you have been saving? Spend it all! Buy stock. As much as you can.

No, really.

Love,
Karen, circa 2007

Wordless Wednesday: Mechanical Bull

See more Wordless Wednesday participants at the WW Headquarters

and at 5 Minutes for Mom.

Blast From the Past: September

While looking for topics to write on, I thought it might be fun to post some pictures of our family from a year ago this week. That way we can remember what we were up to, how much time flies, and see how the kids have changed.

So, while going through my old photo files, I thought why not expand that and show a picture from each year. I apologize for the quality of some of these, as I did not have a good digital camera until about a year ago.

The first picture is from Sept 2003. Noah is not quite one year old. Don’t you love the Mohawk? It just did that naturally, and I missed it so much when it finally grew long and heavy and fell over that I occasionally and unsuccessfully moussed it back up. My friend there is Karen Egan who I met back when we went to Orange Coast College. She eventually became involved in Renaissance Faires and spends her life traveling with her kids from Faire to Faire. She homeschools her kids (alongside other Rennie kids) and loves it. Here, she was at an Ohio Faire and we drove down there to see her.

When we were living in Akron I heard about this awesome place called Nelson Ledges Quarry. Its a campground wrapped around a quarry-lake that is run by a bunch of deadheads who throw Grateful Dead type concerts nearly every weekend all summer. You laze on the beach all day, listen to a concert in the evening, and hang with cool neighbors in the evening, listening to the guitar music. We went at the end of that season and LOVED it, and were disappointed that we would not likely be back soon. (Then we got pregnant with twins and camping was right out) That is Noah sticking his head out of our tent, still wearing his jammies. It was September 2004, making him not quite two years old. Almost exactly the age that the twins are right now. He loved the drum-makers stall and the drum maker let him come over and bang away whenever Noah felt like it.

Next up is Noah in September of 2005, in the back room of the "River House", as Noah dubbed our lovely home on the Cuyahoga River (which used to look like this but now looks like this). He is playing on his "dollar store guitar" which was about the best dollar I ever spent. Kept him busy for hours each week. I think he has a bit of a black swollen eye there.

Also from September 2005 is one from the trip Michael and I took to Toronto because we knew we were pregnant with twins and it might be our last chance to go on a trip alone without kids for many years. We were right. That is Niagara Falls behind us, where we stopped on our way to Canada. That’s my big belly and chipmonk cheeks, too.

Lastly, we have a shot from a year ago this month. This is the day we were loading up the moving truck and saying goodbye to our friends before moving west. This shot includes the five of us, my mom and dad on the left, my brother on the bottom right, his kids Erin and Sam in the front row beside my mom, and the other four are the Crow family, close family friends for many years. Forgive some of us, as we were hot and sweaty from loading the moving truck.

Not lookin' our very best.

To say the least.

Hope you enjoyed this blast from the past. I think I might try to do this once each month. My photos are pretty well organized (although they only go back a few years) so it should be fairly easy to do.

Hope your September was lovely!